Just to keep it open, all of my blog posts are a reflection of my views and experiences on modern-day dating. Many of which actually happen to either me or close friends without any fabrication. Why be so honest, you may ask? Well, for one, in many cases, men are evil. And two, it allows for other women to realize that they are not alone in this chaotic jungle. But some men can relate as well. It’s not just men who are contradictory assholes, but women can fall into that category as well. Just goes to show that you are not crazy and there’s a reason behind every good and bad relationship. You just have to figure out the purpose, use it, and move on.
I have the tendency to date men who think they know what they want, but really, they don’t even have a clue on what they want to eat for lunch. And lucky me, I manage to find them. Rather, they somehow manage a way to pry into my life between my daily excursions of work, side hustling, and more work. Then, silly me, I believe their fairytale ideas of unicorn-and-rainbow relationships.
Typically, it’s hard to run across a man who is looking for some sort of committed relationship. Supposedly, they’re out boasting their desires for marriage and children, family reunions with the boo, date nights, and weekends where the two of you can sit inside and cuddle all day.
These are the same men who uplift you, saying how beautiful you are, you’re the woman they’ve always dreamed of, magical-Disney-shit-that-doesn’t-really-exist, etcetera etcetera etcetera. They love looking at you, they admire you, and to be fairly honest, they probably couldn’t get anyone better, but you don’t mind because this man finds a way to make you feel beautiful. Regardless if you make more money, nonetheless if you possibly have bigger and more active aspirations, it doesn’t matter if you’re slightly emotionally more stable, you cherish their presence because you do like them and they seem to really care about you. Even more so, it seems as if they’re not a bullshitter about the romantic world. But oh, how you are so wrong.
Along the way to what you think could become paradise, things go awry. He stops calling, stops picking up the phone, stops sending text messages. Then again, he could have that random conversation with you about how he’s not ready for commitment (but you’ve been dating/talking for several months), or – my personal favorite – he responds out of spite for something that you are completely unaware of and breaks things off after you’ve already moved on due to his ghosthood. I can probably speak for most women when I say: WHAT THE FUCK.
The part that pisses us off the most is that we never even wanted these guys. Ever. We never chase them, never pursue them, were never even turned on by their quirky nature but always thought they could be worth the time because, again, this is the guy who seems so solid on preaching commitment. Yeah, it’s all bullshit. We waste time, energy, money, gas, and, in some cases, cooked dinners on these morons who still have no idea on how they’re going to plan their retirement.
I consider these men (and, sometimes women for some) to be non-commitment committals. They long so much for companionship, to be cherished, loved and appreciated, but reject it when they get it. It’s like they say: “dogs chasing cars.” And once they get the car, they don’t know what to do with it. Rather, they lick their balls, hoping that the hot day hasn’t caused their pants to chafe their crotch.
Many times, ego comes into play. Excuse me, ego ALWAYS comes into play. Maybe at some point, they realize that you found the manual of their bullshit autobiography and realized that it wasn’t a good read. Maybe they got scared last minute. Maybe they’d prefer to spend majority of their time writing faulty dating blogs than actually partake in any relationship of substance. Who knows.
These are the people who should not concern themselves more so about finding love. Maybe they would be better off really getting to know themselves…in some sort of solitary confinement as committals typically do. Push come to shove, if no one else feels sorry for them, I’m sure they can manage a way to feel sorry for themselves. Hey, ego is a bitch, but they have enough of it by themselves rather than forcing someone else to deal with it. For everyone else, you have the initial gut feeling to stay away. The gut never lies, and maybe we don’t listen because we got caught up in this bastard delivering so many compliments in the beginning. The best thing about this type, they always come back with a creepy smile as if nothing ever happened. Goodbye, self-righteous, narcissistic, delusional dickhead.
Brooke Leigh Howard 